Finding my North Star with Elevation Barn in the USA

Juliet Kinsman reviews an intelligent transformation retreat near Millbrook in New York, where she discovers clarity of purpose, her North Star and how to eat an elephant

Receiving an invitation to Elevation Barn is a mini workshop in itself. Wondering what it will involve, thinking about where you would like support in your life, how it might help and where you want to be. There is a gentle and curiosity-stoking set of questions, you feel seen and heard before you even set off, your appetite whet for learning and self-improvement. Once you’ve been interviewed to ensure you’re the right fit with their retreats and signed up to be matched to the chemistry of a specific retreat, your journey begins.

Arriving at New York's JFK, where I overnighted at an airport hotel, I was a little daunted at what the next three days would involve. As open and confident as I seem in my normal life, I often experience paralysis even at the thought of having to share deep, personal reflections with a group of strangers. On my 90-minute transfer past Manhattan’s iconic skyline, through tempo-dropping rural Hudson Valley landscapes, and the self-reflection began. It felt less an indulgence to be dedicating the next couple of days to this process, more a privilege to be spending time with what would no doubt be an interesting coterie of curious co-retreaters.

Barn time strengthens muscles to help us make wiser choices — at home, in our careers, through our relationships, in every sense — you could say it’s like ‘purpose bulking’. After only three nights away, I left feeling powerlifted with an easy-to-follow future-manifesting regime

There is nothing more disarming than arriving at BlueHills Estate, and being greeted with a warm hug by Will Travis. The founder of Elevation Barn is from the north of England, and he has got an energy that immediately puts you at ease, makes you feel welcome and as though you’re entirely among friends from the get-go. BlueHills was originally his family's home, and he’s designed the property in a way that it lends itself perfectly to soul-uplifting sociable reunions, convivial mealtimes and escapes from the city.

For us, the magic began with a beautiful lunch around the huge dining table in the open-plan kitchen and living space, in the beating heart of this grand family home. We chewed over our answers to the simple questions we had been sent in advance, and which has sparked deeper thinking before we'd even arrived. Our conversations and exercises moved fireside to the library, a stylish enclave filled with curios and beautiful books to feed every interest.

The seven-bedroom white-clapboard home is impressive without being ostentatious, set in acres of private undulating parkland, overlooking the most charming lake with dotted seating areas amid the foliage and green. The lovingly tended grounds also ensure the view out of every window of this home is a treat. Residents can head out on country hikes from the property, along winding country lanes or hop in the car and you’re only 10 minutes from the historic town of Millbrook. We stayed put in the warm hug of BlueHills, except for our early-morning gentle walks.

Breakfast was a parade of delicious nutritious options, family-style lunch was sometimes outside under the trees, ending says with after-dinner drinks by the fire pit or tea by the hearth. I grilled Will on whether the dynamic between so many A-type personalities ever presents challenges. But, just as was happening between our group of three women, three men, plus our leader, spanning five nationalities, their alchemy insures an instant camaraderie, kindness and eagerness to elevate each other.

Elevation Barn is fast earning a reputation for building a network of exceptional humans unlike any other — be they entrepreneurs, corporate leaders, creatives or sports people — with these retreats setting participants on course to live lives with unwavering purpose. Their winning formula has come from a framework honed over years of working with some of the world's best-known corporations.

Yet this under-the-radar people-focused initiative means time spent in this way couldn't feel more human or more personalised. As someone who’s experienced and hosted lots of professional branding workshops, it was satisfying to approach a totally non-work-related pursuit of self-knowledge in a way you know is going to stay with you to better guide you in all aspects of your life. Desmond Tutu famously said that the only one way to eat an elephant is one bite at a time: this has been translated into a coaching exercise which forms the foundation of your second day, where you unpack and prioritise all that you need to optimise your approach to life.

Barn time strengthens muscles to help us make wiser choices — at home, in our careers, through our relationships, in every sense — you could say it's like 'purpose bulking’. After only three nights away, I left feeling powerlifted with an easy-to-follow future-manifesting regime.

As carefully formatted as the time is, the activities and assignments are not intimidating thanks to taking place in this comfortable, convivial home-from-home setting. We quickly built important bonds as a tribe of six. The perfectly planned tried-and-tested programme helps you work towards articulating your purpose, so you can have real agency over your impact in the world. And since you’re with only a handful of carefully chosen fellow retreaters, it feels incredibly productive from what is astonishingly transformational for only a four-day retreat.

By the final day, I felt so grateful I’d invested in this time to better understand myself, and take ownership of how best to move forward in my life, clarify what I need more of, and how to set and reach realistic goals best suited to my skills, I was emailing so many friends just to say hello or to evangelise about this path to improved self-belief. Have I actioned everything all that I felt empowered to aim for? I’m definitely on my way — and I'm ticking things off my list one juicy morsel of elephant at a time.

Juliet Kinsman

London-based journalist, sustainability advocate and broadcaster, spending more than three decades sharing stories about the world’s most special places to spend time. Founding editor of Mr & Mrs Smith, author of Louis Vuitton City Guides and the first Sustainability Editor of Condé Nast Traveller, Juliet extols eco-luxury for The Times through to Sky News and the BBC, and is the author of The Green Edit: Travel (Easy Tips for the Eco-Traveller) published by Ebury Books.

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